Anne Learns To Recruit

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Yes, this is a parody. However, there are truths here that should not be ignored. If you are now, or expect to become, involved with recruitment, read this and take heed ...
Harry? Hi! It's Anne. Anne Frazer, up in development. How's it going?

Well, Harry, I'm not going to make your life any easier, I guess. I need four more programmers. Yesterday.

OK, what I'm looking for is easy. We're got a pretty dynamic environment in the department. New projects, new technologies, and new application domains, everything's up for grabs. So I'm looking for really flexible people, people with a broad background who can pick things up quickly. Our developers work with the end users, so they need people skills, and they need to have the smarts to recognise new opportunities as they present themselves. I need team players, but not a bunch of clones. I want to experiment with putting a wild card or two in the group and see how it shakes things up. Can you find these people for me?

That's hard to say. We use a few. Ideally, I want people who can pick up languages as needed, and who have a good solid background in two or three major ones.

Well, the current project is in C++ ...

.... but I know the next is in Java and Javascript.

I have to choose one?

I suppose so.

Well, we do most of our development on Windows, but there's some Linux-based server work.

Umm.. Well most of our applications run on all of those.

Well, I'm not sure. We still have all those other operating systems and Linux to consider.

OK, OK, put Windows Vista then. Whatever you say.

I guess some of our projects use Oracle, and in the past we've used MQ Series, and some Visibroker.

8.1.5 and 4.5.

A week later...

Looking for highly motivated developers
to work in dynamic environment. Must have
4 years C++ and extensive Windows Vista.
Oracle 8.1.5, MQ Series, and Visibroker 4.5

Three weeks later...

Harry? Anne again. I was wondering: we still haven't seen any people to fill those jobs.



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